NYT: Kids, Would You Please Start Fighting

[orangerful]

I just skimmed this opinion piece in the New York Times but I already like where it is going

Kids, Would You Please Start Fighting

Did you all have to take a speech and debate class in school?

I haven't heard Tim's daughter mention it, though I think I took it Junior year so that would be next year for her and might not be on her radar yet. But I think nowadays we associate debate with fighting and that is not true. People can have debates and arguments and still be friends because you don't have to make it personal. That was the whole point of the class was to learn how to do research and use facts to support your point of view in a professional manner.

And the thing about parents arguing vs fighting vs hiding it when the kids are around is another great point. I've always had issues with how to handle my disagreements with Tim when his daughter is in the room because I know on one hand that when I was a kid seeing my parents argue always upset me and I know his daughter is sensitive but on the other hand, it is good for her to see that we don't always agree on everything 100% and that we can still love each other if our views don't line up completely.

What about you? Especially those of you with kiddos? Thoughts?

Comments

[yourlibrarian]

Afraid I have no kiddos but I can say my parents didn't make much of an effort to hide arguments, even when they were about me, and there was always a lot of yelling in the house. It didn't bother me much though, it just seemed normal. I think there is something to be said about having visible disagreements and then just moving on afterwards.

I remember that for the first year or so of our relationship Mike was wary of ever disagreeing with me, and worried that any arguments we had might mean things were over. After a while he realized we could spat and then just get on with things because if you've got that much tranquility going on then it's probably because you're not really engaging with one another on anything.

[thenewbuzwuzz]

Nice article! :) I had some occasional debating in my foreign language classes, I think. I lost most of my interest straight away, though, when they told me I couldn't choose which opinion to represent.
Yup, it's so important to be able to handle disagreement politely and calmly. I'm not altogether great at it.