Fandom memories -- Gillian Anderson

[orangerful]

So...it was just announced this week that Gillian "Dana Scully" Anderson will be one of the guests at this year's Dragon*Con

Time for my to ramble a bit about my first fandom, my first girl crush, and how unbelievabley uncool I was in high school



I've rambled about X-Files a little bit before, but mostly when leading up to why I love Joss Whedon and Buffy so much. But, really, X-Files was my first fandom. It probably was for a lot of people since it was lucky enough to be a popular show right when the Internet was born. I used to spend hours on the Prodigy message boards reading people's different filks and short stories. I avoided going out on Friday nights so I could record each episode on VHS (and edit out the commercials, you could fit an extra episode on SLP if you took out the commercials, that's 7 episodes per VHS!). I even wrote a full script (with a guest starring role for myself...I didn't know what "Mary Sue" was yet, but dammit, Mulder's sister's name was Samantha and so was mine, IT WAS A SIGN). And while I had a megacrush on David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson also played a large role in my geeky adolescent life.

I wanted to be Scully so bad. When I went to the mall and shopped at Express, I wasn't looking at the booty shorts. I was eyeing up the suits (I eventually bought one that was slightly too small but on clearance. It was a gorgeous dark blue). When I had to get my glasses, I comforted myself in finding a frame that looked like Scully's (which were not hip or chic, just pretty average glasses). I even remember trying to hold my mouth the same way Gillian holds hers, that slight pout and a bit of tightness. And that red hair. OOOOh I wanted red hair sooooo badly.

But the biggest thing that X-Files helped bring to my life was my awesome friendship with bittertwee. She was already friends with my Uncle and I had talked with her when they would visit, but we connected when the conversation turned to X-Files and we both realized we were huge fans of the show. We kept in touch via snail mail and then email, discussing all the different aspects of the show as it changed over the years. While I was drooling over David, she was obsessing over Gillian. It was the start of me learning how to really pick apart a show and examine all the different layers.

In the end, the show let us down (Two words - Butt Genie) (more Chris Carter's fault than anyone elses), but all those years of complaining together built up a very strong friendshp that I cherish to this day.

So I'm hoping that Gillian Anderson is in the walk of fame at Dragon*Con so I can go up to her and thank her. Her sheer awesomeness made me demand more from my female characters on TV and also of the actresses I saw. It won't be the waterworks of meeting Felicia or Joss, but probably more like the babbling I did to Sean Patrick Flannery.

Still, I look forward to embarassing myself in front of this talented woman if I can get the chance ;-)

Comments

[rrebelespresso.livejournal.com]

This sounds very familiar...!! I dyed my hair red, had the Scully haircut... bought boots like hers, wore suits... oh dear.

[orangerful.livejournal.com]

She was a really strong female character! I can't think of any other women on TV at that time who was so independent and smart and hot! Of COURSE we idolized her :)

[starbuck92.livejournal.com]

Ha, you sound like me. XF was also my first internet fandom, and I loved finding new fic to read and even write some of my own. And Scully was and is still one of my heroes. Hope you get to meet Gillian! The closest I've gotten is sending her a letter when I was in college along with a Longhorns baseball cap (I was attending UT at the time) and receiving a response back! I still have it safely tucked away in my autographs binder.

[orangerful.livejournal.com]

I have a feeling this story rings true for many of us. :) I still have my autographed photo of DD and GA from when I sent my first fan mail in. I really hope Gillian is just in the autograph hall and I can at least say hello.

[bittertwee.livejournal.com]

Can't believe I'm just getting to this now! I didn't know you were also into the "Scully as role model" aspect of the show. That's definitely what did it for me. I don't know what it was about her character, and I'm not up enough on old television shows to say this definitively, but I feel like there hadn't been a female character like her before XF. I know some of my friends have mentioned female tv heroes from before then (Emma Peel comes to mind), but any shows I liked before then had men in the lead roles with (usually helpless and often not as bright) female sidekicks. I think Scully was intended to be that way at first (which was reflected in the pay differential for a disgracefully long time), but Gillian did something to that role.. I truly think XF wouldn't have been the same show without her. I guess I'll give CC some credit for intentionally flipping gender stereotypes (Mulder was gullible and passionate, Scully cool and rational), but Gillian filled out the part, often with just small changes in expression, and made the character much more than just a female character designed to pay lip service to the idea that women can be smart too.

I might have mentioned this, but when I joined the group which will remain nameless so this isn't google-able, I assumed anything devoted to Gillian Anderson fandom and a sci-fi show would be full of teenage boys. (no that's NOT why I joined!). Come to find out it was made up almost entirely of professional/ educated women in my age range (back then, mid-20s- mid30s), many in the sciences or medical fields. Clearly she struck a chord with women who appreciated finally seeing someone like themselves on tv, or at least someone who they aspired to be.

Speaking of said group, it was also my first foray into social networking (back then a mailing list and website), meeting people based on a fandom, and, for better or for worse, wasting too damn much time online. I guess it helped me sort out early on the pros and cons of online life and what's worth spending time on and what isn't (for me). I somehow avoided getting sucked into anything after that until tumblr did me in a year or so ago.

And I don't know if we would have been as good friends without the initial XF connection starting off the correspondence. Maybe we would have.. I still had an apartment in Boston and maybe you would have crashed there with your friends anyway :) Oh, and there's always How.. I mean, he who shall not be named :)

Oh, and both Jim and I thought your XF script was good! Ok, now I'm wanting to watch the show again..

[bittertwee.livejournal.com]

I should add that I should also thank you for getting me into "the singer who shall not be named". That phase really got me comfortable going out alone to the small clubs around here, and, well.. we all know where that led..

[orangerful.livejournal.com]

Same here. If it hadn't been for Voldemort, I doubt I would have so many great musical adventures under my belt either. So at least something good came out of that. (at least I never got a dark mark tattooed on my arm)

[orangerful.livejournal.com]

I don't know if I *realized* she was a role model at the time, but looking back now I see myself idolizing her as much as I obsessed over David Duchovny's prettiness.

XF was a pretty big deal. :)

[toothlesshag.livejournal.com]

I'm not a big xfiles fan, really, but I just noticed Jillian Anderson has cool eyes - and they are almost the exact same color as mine - blue green grey.